“Government Publishes Detailed Instructions on How To Roast Marshmallows”: WHAT??! Did the Government Actually Pay For Such a Study and Document?

The U.S. Forestry Department just published a detailed step-by-step document on how to safely roast marshmallows. 

Excuse me?

The U.S. Forestry Department just published a detailed step-by-step document on how to safely roast marshmallows.

THE GOVERNMENT PAID SOMEONE TO RESEARCH AND PUBLISH THIS KIND OF THING??!   If I want a step by step guide, they should have gone and asked a Boy Scout or Girl Scout to write it down on a piece of paper for them.  They wouldn’t have needed to come out with a 700-word manual on roasting marshmallows.

What is this wacko government doing??!